A Battle , A Fight — Growing Up

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I was at a friend’s place. I saw a kid over there, well I actually met her. She was such a sweetheart. She would take out money from her mom’s bag to get an ice-cream when she heard the music play, she would  jump up and down the staircase even after being told not to. That made me wonder, she doesn’t care about being scolded, she doesn’t care what others think of her actions. All she knows is that she can do anything & everything that makes her happy & satisfied. She isn’t bothered about getting hurt when jumping on the staircase; she lives in that very moment, & not caring whether her next step brings her pain or gain.

But I realize, how very soon the world’s customs would take that all away from her, all her innocence. How she’d miss it all, just like I do right now. Everyone & everything would try hard to change her, mold her into something she’s not. It’ll be her fight to maintain & sustain it all. A hard battle, I call Growing Up

And we become FRIENDS

That moment, that very moment when you see someone so often that you start to have a huge crush on him…and you wish to get to talk to him, like normal friends, But it just doesn;t seem to be that way, you hardly get to talk to him. And you keep wishing to become friends in order to get done with the heart-melting-crush feelings.

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Something quite similar happened with me, I saw this guy, had a crush on him, wanted to become friends, only friends; so that I wont have that funny feeling in my tummy when he comes around. Lucky me, we soon became friends, I even got his number. We’d have chats once in a while. And we’d talk all funny, laughing and giggling. Though he did have other friends who were far too close to him than I was, but I didnt mind that.

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And we became friends, I could not believe it. It was just the right thing. Now we get to chat once in a while, I dont have to stalk him 😛  we’re actually real good friends. We had quite some decent talk-times, he’d tell me about his favorite music , tv series and movies. I’d laugh when he cracks silly jokes. We’d talk and talk. I like it this way. Everything seems fine. 

Could it be any worse?

I feel so so so so so so so mad and angry and furious and wrathful and ughh!

Why, why do people have to be so irritating?? Why so mean and selfish!!

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The thing is, my boss decided to give that trio a bonus for this month, just because they handled our best customers in the best possible way. It could’ve been me, if only they had not stabbed my back.

Ouch! It hurts deep down inside. I am not in a good mood right now. Oh great, here they come. I wonder what they’re up to this time.

Love Has Nothing to Do With Five Senses

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The intellectual is always showing off,

the lover is always getting lost.

The intellectual runs away.

afraid of drowning;

the whole business of love

is to drown in the sea.

Intellectuals plan their repose;

lovers are ashamed to rest.

The lover is always alone.

even surrounded by people;

like water and oil, he remains apart.

The man who goes to the trouble 

of giving advice to a lover

get nothing. He’s mocked by passion.

Love is like musk. It attracts attention.

Love is a tree, and the lovers are its shade.

Kulliyat-e Shams, 21

Backstabbers, I hate them!

I know how hard it is living in a world where people talk of originality but they themselves are heck of FAKERS. I hate them , I hate them, I hate them!! 

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The thing is, there’s this young ladies trio at work,  always smiling and acting all sweet.  But now I know the real face of them. Day before yesterday, we had alot of amazing  customers coming in, all of us were assigned a bunch of customers to deal with, but F*ck! The three of them took away my customers, and I had a bunch of losers left with me. They were acting all DIVAS, huh! I was so so pissed off, our boss was too busy to listen to me! or  Even reply to my texts to inform me if there was any change of plans.

The trio wont listen to me, all the SWEETNESS & SMILES were gone, I was gobsmacked! I’m not even in a position to take over there job or anything, in fact I’m planning to leave this workplace in a couple of weeks. Why would they do this to me?? WHY?

I still cant believe HOW do such people always win the race when it comes to professional life? WHY do only BAD ASSES reach the top?? Where did ”Honesty is the Best Policy” go??

I’m so scared, I’m frightened! I wont survive in my professional life 😦 I’ll be bruised and crushed and wiped out. What am I going to do? 

And the trio were acting all chewing gumy with the team leader.

Becoming the Giver of Light – Rumi

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I was dead
I came alive
I was tears
I became laughter

All because of love
when it arrived
my temporal life
from then on
changed to eternal

Love said to me
you are not
crazy enough
you don’t
fit this house

I went and
became crazy
crazy enough
to be in chains

Love said
you are not
intoxicated enough
you don’t
fit the group

I went and
got drunk
drunk enough
to overflow
with light-headedness

Love said
you are still
too clever
filled with
imagination and skepticism

I went and
became gullible
and in fright
pulled away
from it all

Love said
you are a candle
attracting everyone
gathering every one
around you

I am no more
a candle spreading light
I gather no more crowds
and like smoke
I am all scattered now

Love said
you are a teacher
you are a head
and for everyone
you are a leader

I am no more
not a teacher
not a leader
just a servant
to your wishes

Love said
you already have
your own wings
I will not give you
more feathers

And then my heart
pulled itself apart
and filled to the brim
with a new light
overflowed with fresh life

Now even the heavens
are thankful that
because of love
I have become
the giver of light.

— Rumi